Anxiety of Success

Comfort Zone

 

“This is your comfort zone. And this is were the magic happens. Outside of your comfort zone.” says the editor while encouraging Hannah to write an article about drugs in the TV show Girls. And maybe magic does happen for Hannah, but probably because she is incredibly high. Because for me getting out of my comfort zone usually comes with a lot of stress induced stomach sizzles and anxiety.

My comfort zone includes precisely two things. My couch and my computer. But I am well aware that, this combo will probably not end up with me being on the cover of People’s 30 under 30 list. And yes, that is something I secretly (not so secretly anymore) dream of. However, anytime a possiblity introduces itself for me to get close to something I have always wanted to do, along with my excitement I also face endless fear and anxiety.

Dreams look nice and pretty in your own imagination but once you are starting to materialize them, they start to look a little terrifying. Because the possibility of failing at your dream also becomes a higher probability.

We are so busy dealing with the fears that come from chasing our dreams, we barely talk about the ones that are caused by them. But once you come to the edge of success and realize that you are still filled with anxiety, it makes you question if your dreams were the right ones for you.

It is so easy to tell the difference between a nightmare and a dream. One of them makes you want to sleep forever whereas the other makes you terrified of ever going back to sleep. But in real life, the lines are much more blurry.

Even though we have been thought to believe we should all run after our dreams so we can lead happy lifes, real life will probably never be as clear-cut as a that. There will be downfalls and what you have grown to think you wanted won’t be always what you want once you get there. But as Matika Wilbur says “If it doesn’t scare you, it is not worth your time.”

So maybe the magic does happen outside of your comfort zone. But it will probably be more like black magic. Where there are no unicorns and you will have to go through monsters before you end up in the fields of caramel fudge. That is how magic works, right?

 

 

Have you ever experienced anxiety from getting to do things you have wanted to do? Tell me about it in the comments section.

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